Do you remember where you were

Well I dont want to seem unsensitive but Manic its either her poppa whom im sure she loves to death will tell her or some random teacher will tell her. I wish you the best of luck in this situation manic. Children are pure innocence until they see society for what it is and it is not pretty.

manic your a top dad


you will know how to go about explaining the truth



bomber

^^^ The above comments are true Manic ^^^

Its better she becomes aware of bad things and people sooner rather than later, because she will come across them .. , because we can't be there to protect our children all the time .

Better her eyes are open than closed.


Pure

Thanks guys...



Ya all speak the wisdom. Just like all parents we see our wee ones as things of beauty and are reminded of the brilliance of the world by the sparkle in their eyes that we hope will never fade.



I remember being a kid and seeing the news about the Jonestown Massacre and that's when I realized that the true monsters aren't vampires or ghouls or demons...it was "us"...humanity.



She comes to me before anyone else for the truth about anything and everything so, of course, this shouldn't be any different...just soul-crushing for her Daddy when he sees the look in her eyes when she comprehends what's just been told to her.

Yep, you can't protect them their entire lives from everything that is cruel and inhumane in the world. As said, kids already know and understand a lot more than we think, and sometimes they feel that asking questions about things that frighten them is a bad thing. I know my kids have said they appreciate it when I fully explain some things to them, even when it hurts to do so. It's natural to want to maintain their innocence, keep them alienated from things like that which make them grow up too fast. Sometimes the best lessons are the worst examples though.

I sometimes struggle with how to explain adult situations to my kids too. I have a 9 yo, 6yo and 6 month old and they are all obviously in different stages of development. I find my 9 yo is very mature and well equipped to handle information like what is being discussed. I can speak to him as an adult in most cases. I find with my 6 yo, I can still tell her the truth, but I deliver it in a different way...a bit more tactfully if you will.

I agree with all the advice given. Either they find out the truth from me...someone they trust and love, or a stranger.

I have told them from a young age that there are very bad people in this world...people who want to hurt us any chance they get. That may be terrorists, child predators, etc. I believe being vigilant is an important life skill and is best learned at an early age.

Quote :

I believe being vigilant is an important life skill and is best learned at an early age.

+1 for that sir.

[quote="MANIC"Just like all parents we see our wee ones as things of beauty and are reminded of the brilliance of the world by the sparkle in their eyes that we hope will never fade.[/quote]

Kids are awesome in that the dont have a 'point of reference' so to speak. Parents and caregivers provide the point of reference. Meaning, it is likely that your child will be less upset by the exchange than you will. For you, you are mouring the loss of your shild innocence. For your child it is about learning and growing up. Learning and growing up provides them a sense of compentency and accomplishment. The balance that I struggle with is trying to find a balance of making sure that the world is full of crazy asshats who what to do you harm and there are a lot of people who are kind and selfless and woudl give a stranger the shirt off ther back. How do you warn them to be on the lookout and still love the world they live in? I think you can find this balance Manic.

Also kids are reflections and barometers of their family systems. So, their level of distrees will reflect your level of distress.

8 yr olds are still pretty concrete so dont use metaphors because they will take them literally. Example: 8 yr Kid dying of cancer. Mom tells kid: when you die your soul will leave your body and go up to heaven. Kid 2 days later is crying because they are worried about their soul getting caught in the wires and pipes that are in the ceiling. Very concrete thinking. Once you tell them be ready to answer clarifying questions for the next little bit.

Sure most of you know this already anyway...

I turned on the news to see the reports and then watched the plane fly into the second tower live. Stunned, shocked, sad, scared. I sat there with a feeling of emptiness and loss that is hard to describe, like the inside of you is dry and trembling. Commuter jets filled with people who just wanted to get to point B to go to their meetings, or go home, or go be with family or friends. Snuffed out is a second, an instant. I often think of what it was like in the final seconds when the passangers were resigned to their fate. I too wonder at the terror someone must have felt to jump hundreds of feet out of a broken window rather than face the flames. It makes me think that my life, for all the times I find it to be hard or annoying is really just a shadow of discomfort when it comes to what these people went through.

I always hope that at the last second the terrorists clearly saw how evil the thing is that they did and how anethema it is to their religion. I hope that their last seconds were filled with the dred of knowing what they did was wrong and that their version of a higher being was disappointed with what they have done. Then I wished I believed in heaven and hell so there was a place for them to suffer.

+1 winni, great post

I really, really, really dont want to start anything on religion because people usually have strong feelings one way or the other BUT wether you believe or not religion and what people do in its name has a lot to answer for all through the ages.

I was waken by my girlfriend (wife now) with a call, I ran to the TV only to have my jaw hit the floor. AS my heart sank the tears flowed from my eyes like waterfalls...I knew noone in the towers nor around them as my Brother was on Long Island. But I did know them all they were my Brother's and Sister's ! My heart still to the day sinks as this day draws near, and I every year go to the list of the fallen and learn 10 new names of family whom has fallen to remember. I vowed that day to never let these brother's and sister's be forgotten ! To all my Fallen Brother's and Sister's will always be remembered!!